Post by ~Missiour Mattchu~ on Dec 27, 2006 23:59:10 GMT -5
Here`s a short excert from a story that I still never got to writing. 
RESIDENT NON EVIL
Chris was walking down a spooky corridor, in a spooky house, on a spooky night(Spooky enough for you?) One night.
He had been sent in to investigate some mysterious murders. They sent him in with a gun , two clips, and a garden hose.
Chris wondered to himself, "Why the h@ll did they give me a garden hose? What am I going to do with that?" He was walking down the hall, and all of a sudden, BOOM! Some dude charged through a door dressed in a dark coat, and sunglasses.
Chris shouted out screaming like a school girl "AHHH!! WHAT THE HELL?
!!!! ARE YOU TRYING TO GIVE ME A FRICKING HEART ATTACK??!!!!!! WHO THE HELL ARE YOU??? "The unknown man brushed himself off, and stood up saying, "I am Albert Wekser, and you may be? "Chris said, "ALBERT WEKSER!!! AINT YOU THAT GUY WHO LEFT ME IN THAT MANSION TO DIE, AND THEN ALMOST GOT ME KILLED BY THAT CHICK ON FIRE IN RESIDENT EVIL CODE VERONICA X???!!!!!! AND WHY THE HELL ARE YOU A WEARING SUNGLASSES IN A DARK SPOOKY MANSION, ON A DARK SPOOKY NIGHT?
"Wesker didn`t see to notice that the person was Chris, due to the fact that he was wearing them d@mn sunglasses. Wesker shrugged, and said, "Um , Maybe, I don`t know, um....CAN I HAVE A GUN!!!! PLEASE!!! PWEATY PWAESE WITH A CHERRY ON TOP!!!!!" "Fine!" Chris said," just shut up sheesh!" He threw him his garden hose. Wesker said, "WHAT THE HELL??? "Chris said, deal with it, that`s all I got. AND IF YOU TRY TO STRANGLE ME WITH IT, I Will COME BACK AND HAUNT YOUR ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" All of a sudden, the weirdest thing happend, Jim Carrey ran onto the screen, and yelled, "SSSSSMMMMMMMOOOOOKKKKKIIIIIINNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!" Wesker thought he was some kind of weird ass zombie, so he tried to strangle him with his hose.
Jim carrey broke the hose and screamed out AAAASSSSSHOOOOLLLEEE!!!!!!!! Whipped out his scythe, and planted it in wesker`s rear end.
Then, he ran down the hall, and got eaten by a hunter. Chris got out some popcorn and began munching down, enjoying the show.
Then Jim Carrey also, ran down the hall screaming SSSSMMMOOOKKKIIINN!!!!!!!!!!
And got eaten by a hunter. Moments later, the hunter exploded, and Jim Carrey screamed out, SSSSSMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOKKKKKKIIIIIIINNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~The End~
RESIDENT NON EVIL
Chris was walking down a spooky corridor, in a spooky house, on a spooky night(Spooky enough for you?) One night.
He had been sent in to investigate some mysterious murders. They sent him in with a gun , two clips, and a garden hose.
Chris wondered to himself, "Why the h@ll did they give me a garden hose? What am I going to do with that?" He was walking down the hall, and all of a sudden, BOOM! Some dude charged through a door dressed in a dark coat, and sunglasses.
Chris shouted out screaming like a school girl "AHHH!! WHAT THE HELL?
!!!! ARE YOU TRYING TO GIVE ME A FRICKING HEART ATTACK??!!!!!! WHO THE HELL ARE YOU??? "The unknown man brushed himself off, and stood up saying, "I am Albert Wekser, and you may be? "Chris said, "ALBERT WEKSER!!! AINT YOU THAT GUY WHO LEFT ME IN THAT MANSION TO DIE, AND THEN ALMOST GOT ME KILLED BY THAT CHICK ON FIRE IN RESIDENT EVIL CODE VERONICA X???!!!!!! AND WHY THE HELL ARE YOU A WEARING SUNGLASSES IN A DARK SPOOKY MANSION, ON A DARK SPOOKY NIGHT? "Wesker didn`t see to notice that the person was Chris, due to the fact that he was wearing them d@mn sunglasses. Wesker shrugged, and said, "Um , Maybe, I don`t know, um....CAN I HAVE A GUN!!!! PLEASE!!! PWEATY PWAESE WITH A CHERRY ON TOP!!!!!" "Fine!" Chris said," just shut up sheesh!" He threw him his garden hose. Wesker said, "WHAT THE HELL??? "Chris said, deal with it, that`s all I got. AND IF YOU TRY TO STRANGLE ME WITH IT, I Will COME BACK AND HAUNT YOUR ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" All of a sudden, the weirdest thing happend, Jim Carrey ran onto the screen, and yelled, "SSSSSMMMMMMMOOOOOKKKKKIIIIIINNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!" Wesker thought he was some kind of weird ass zombie, so he tried to strangle him with his hose.
Jim carrey broke the hose and screamed out AAAASSSSSHOOOOLLLEEE!!!!!!!! Whipped out his scythe, and planted it in wesker`s rear end.
Then, he ran down the hall, and got eaten by a hunter. Chris got out some popcorn and began munching down, enjoying the show.
Then Jim Carrey also, ran down the hall screaming SSSSMMMOOOKKKIIINN!!!!!!!!!!
And got eaten by a hunter. Moments later, the hunter exploded, and Jim Carrey screamed out, SSSSSMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOKKKKKKIIIIIIINNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~The End~
